Post by Decoy Elite on Oct 25, 2010 10:18:54 GMT -5
There some comics I dislike, some I just plain out hate, some that bring out nothing from hatred from me, and then there is Sidekick. This comic is just, just; ugh it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Honestly, I need to do this just to kill this comic. It needs to die, it’s just that bad. Anyway this is The Rant: Sidekick.
Sidekick is just a clusterflark of everything I hate, bad characters, stupid fan service, stereotypes, horrible plot, and awful boring dialogue. The whole thing, from front to back pisses me off on every damn page. It’s like whoever wrote this thing said “How can I make this comic worse” every time he wrote up a page. The story is par for the course when it comes to this kind of Image comic; it’s retarded and makes no sense at all. Basically you’ve got the main character who’s a douche bag sidekick to some Superman parody. Immediately I get annoyed because this guy is basically a retarded version of Superman and the main character is flarking his wife. Seriously? That’s like flarking Bizzaro’s wife. It’s wrong and yet this comic expects us to even feel connect to this character? Anyway, this shit only gets worse as the story goes on. Turns out that the main character has his own girl friend who’s a total whore that demands he flarks her all the time. Which begs the question, why is he taking the time to sleep with the wife of a guy who can kill him with one punch when his girlfriend wants to have sex all the time anyway? It makes no sense. Freakin’ halfway through this piece of shit and I’m already finding plot holes and you know what’s worse? This flarking comics hasn’t even started the real shit yet.
Now, I don’t want to point out and explain in detail about everything wrong with this comic(I’d be here all day) but I really need to talk about the fan service. First off, it’s pointless. We get two sex scenes off panel (sort of) and they add nothing to the plot except that the main character is an asshole. These scenes star two woman, who are horribly, horribly drawn, with comically large breast that and tiny little waists. They look like they’d snap in half and honestly; it’s completely unappealing as fan service, even for the kind of people that enjoy pointless fan service. These horrifying images are only made worse by the sex scene, the second on to be exact. During said scene you get to see the main character’s girlfriend covered in what can only be described as purple colored seamen. It’s disgusting and I wish I was making that up. I wish I didn’t read a comic with purpled covered seamen……but I did and now you know about it. Do I need to really rant on at this point? I will anyway, just in case someone reading this is retarded enough to try and check this monstrosity out.
As the comic continues, the main character, for no apparent reason, hatches a plan to become the sidekick to multiple heroes. Why? I have no flarking clue. It’s just retarded. Anyway the first guy he tries to become the new sidekick of is this really raciest stereotype black superhero; this horribly racist scene is only made worst by the fact that the main character goes black face in it. Have you ever seen a comic character go black face before? No? THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S RETARDED! Ugh, it’s just awful, racist, horrible, and I never want to read it again. I honestly don’t see how it could get much worse at this point guys, I’m pretty sure it was at this point that I literally punched my computer because I was so pissed at this god awful comic. Anyway, after the most racist comic scene since that kid from the Young Allies, he next dresses up like a girl and becomes the sidekick to a Wonder Woman parody. It’s as awful as it sounds.
I implore you all, don’t read this comic. This comic is so bad that Image comics actually pulled it’s free issue # 1 down it was so bad. Mind you this is the same company that kept up Bomb Queen, Pax Romana, and flarking Elephant Men and they think this thing is too embarrassing to keep up. IT’S THAT BAD. This thing is the worst comic I’ve ever read, hell this think is just the worst thing I’ve read in general and I’ve read the book adaptation of Independence Day and Battlefield Earth. So it’s not like I’ve never dealt with shit before. This comic, as I’ve hinted at before, get a 0 out of 5, no wait it doesn’t even deserve that. This thing goes into the flarking negatives, it’s just worthless. I didn’t even pay to read this comic and yet I still feel ripped off, it’s that flarking bad! Ugh, anyway, there you go the Sidekick rant, I hope it delivered.
Sidekick is just a clusterflark of everything I hate, bad characters, stupid fan service, stereotypes, horrible plot, and awful boring dialogue. The whole thing, from front to back pisses me off on every damn page. It’s like whoever wrote this thing said “How can I make this comic worse” every time he wrote up a page. The story is par for the course when it comes to this kind of Image comic; it’s retarded and makes no sense at all. Basically you’ve got the main character who’s a douche bag sidekick to some Superman parody. Immediately I get annoyed because this guy is basically a retarded version of Superman and the main character is flarking his wife. Seriously? That’s like flarking Bizzaro’s wife. It’s wrong and yet this comic expects us to even feel connect to this character? Anyway, this shit only gets worse as the story goes on. Turns out that the main character has his own girl friend who’s a total whore that demands he flarks her all the time. Which begs the question, why is he taking the time to sleep with the wife of a guy who can kill him with one punch when his girlfriend wants to have sex all the time anyway? It makes no sense. Freakin’ halfway through this piece of shit and I’m already finding plot holes and you know what’s worse? This flarking comics hasn’t even started the real shit yet.
Now, I don’t want to point out and explain in detail about everything wrong with this comic(I’d be here all day) but I really need to talk about the fan service. First off, it’s pointless. We get two sex scenes off panel (sort of) and they add nothing to the plot except that the main character is an asshole. These scenes star two woman, who are horribly, horribly drawn, with comically large breast that and tiny little waists. They look like they’d snap in half and honestly; it’s completely unappealing as fan service, even for the kind of people that enjoy pointless fan service. These horrifying images are only made worse by the sex scene, the second on to be exact. During said scene you get to see the main character’s girlfriend covered in what can only be described as purple colored seamen. It’s disgusting and I wish I was making that up. I wish I didn’t read a comic with purpled covered seamen……but I did and now you know about it. Do I need to really rant on at this point? I will anyway, just in case someone reading this is retarded enough to try and check this monstrosity out.
As the comic continues, the main character, for no apparent reason, hatches a plan to become the sidekick to multiple heroes. Why? I have no flarking clue. It’s just retarded. Anyway the first guy he tries to become the new sidekick of is this really raciest stereotype black superhero; this horribly racist scene is only made worst by the fact that the main character goes black face in it. Have you ever seen a comic character go black face before? No? THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S RETARDED! Ugh, it’s just awful, racist, horrible, and I never want to read it again. I honestly don’t see how it could get much worse at this point guys, I’m pretty sure it was at this point that I literally punched my computer because I was so pissed at this god awful comic. Anyway, after the most racist comic scene since that kid from the Young Allies, he next dresses up like a girl and becomes the sidekick to a Wonder Woman parody. It’s as awful as it sounds.
I implore you all, don’t read this comic. This comic is so bad that Image comics actually pulled it’s free issue # 1 down it was so bad. Mind you this is the same company that kept up Bomb Queen, Pax Romana, and flarking Elephant Men and they think this thing is too embarrassing to keep up. IT’S THAT BAD. This thing is the worst comic I’ve ever read, hell this think is just the worst thing I’ve read in general and I’ve read the book adaptation of Independence Day and Battlefield Earth. So it’s not like I’ve never dealt with shit before. This comic, as I’ve hinted at before, get a 0 out of 5, no wait it doesn’t even deserve that. This thing goes into the flarking negatives, it’s just worthless. I didn’t even pay to read this comic and yet I still feel ripped off, it’s that flarking bad! Ugh, anyway, there you go the Sidekick rant, I hope it delivered.